About love and desire

I have written some very short stories, trying to show the radical difference between love and desire, I mean desires in general, not exclusively the sexual one, but others very powerful in our lives, like desire to be loved, to be respected, to be free, to receive, and so. As all bad writers,I needed to use real facts conveniently changed, due to my lack of literary creativity.  At the end, I have included a comment about the conclusions we can make about all of it. Let’s go!

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The beautiful couple

Liz_and_Martini

Liz Taylor & Martini’s boy

He was a very handsome sixteen boy, those who knew him said he seemed an Italian playboy, and she was only thirteen, and was the nicest girl of the neighborhood, those who knew her said she seemed the actress Liz Taylor when she was very young. They met for first time at a dance, it was first seeing love. She thought he was so handsome and strong, he thought she was so sweet and beautiful. They dated for seven years and eventually got married.

First problems arise just in the honeymoon, and were increasing, but even so they had their first son a year after being married. Which problems arise? Basically, he expected a certain behavior from her, never happened, and viceversa. Their inner desires, never expressed clearly, perhaps partly unconscious, never fulfilled. As a result: increasing frustration. In the following years the relationship became more and more damaged, hurting children of course. Eventually they became separated at their middle age.

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The sisters

Perfect sisters movie

Perfect sisters movie

She was six years old when was born their sister, an event that caused an extraordinary illusion to her. She loves to help her mother to take care of the sister, and this love continued in the following years, even increased. She used to help her sister in the schoolwork, also she loved to play with her young sister. Their parents were delighted: so very nice sisters! Is not usual to see such behaviour, on the contrary, many times brothers and sisters are competitive, even rude among them.

When the young sister reached puberty, their behavior towards her older sister started to go wrong. It was inexplicable for the older, what happened? Sometimes the young ridiculed the old, sometimes ignored her, even sometimes she showed envious of her achievements. And things went worse with time. But the old sister resisted, and kept their loving behavior towards her. As a result, she became damaged a lot of times. When the old sister got married, the young aim was to sow discord between their parents and the sister’s husband, conspiring, talking bad about him, and she was successful. At a consequence, the old loving sister had bitter arguments with their parents. At last, the old sister had to accept that she could not continue in such way. Now both sister never speak, they ignore each other, even in family celebrations. And their relationship with parents, even with her husband, were damaged.

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The boss and the assistant

The assistant movie

The assistant movie

He was a middle aged man, with an intermediate position in a large company, also a good marriage, and a good economic position. All his workmates love him due their always positive attitude, also thanks he love to help others. As a boss, he loves try to help their employees to develop professionally, almost like a teacher. She was twenty six years old when she started to work as assistant of the man. It was her second job after finish their studies. She was brilliant, and quickly she learnt the teachings of the boss about the company. They hit it off from the start. Even she invited him go skiing with her friends, an invitation he had to reject due his wife not skiing at all.

Eventually she fell in love with him, and gradually started to send “signals” to him, a usual behaviour in this situation, especially when one of the partners are married.  But he didn’t notice any signal, convinced about their friendly relationship. Indeed, he also love these woman, but was a friendly love, without any desire of possession. With time, she became frustrated due to the lack of reaction of the man, and started to behaviour bad: at times she didn’t greet him, even she avoid him, she stop to talk with him, even she ask for a transfer to another section. And still the man did not understand what happened: maybe I had made something wrong? The situation damaged him a bit, because he felt rejected for an old good friend, without any explanation. At last he realized what happened. Due to their helping nature, decided to get away from her, even against their feelings, because it was the only way he could help her. At a result, the old good friends and nice workmates didn’t speak anymore, only if necessary, and in a cold and professional way,  and the friendship was broken forever. And the man learned a new lesson: take care about to be too friendly with young single women, better to be cold with them!

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Comments and conclusions

There are a common idea behind all this stories; in brief, desires can kill love, on the contrary people think. Is usual to think desire is non separable from love. But is the contrary, indeed. Frequently we think love and desire are almost synonyms. Is not true. I mean selfish desires, of course.  True love can produce desires: ones related with the welfare of beloved one. Is the case of the sisters stories, the old sister loves the young one, wants her welfare, but in this case the young don’t want the love of older, and she is not wrong at all: nobody have the obligation to accept to be loved. So selfish desires within a loving relationship can destroy it. No matter if the relationship is amongst spouses, sisters or brothers, parents and childrens, friends.

When we discover we really are made of Love, then we stop to look for it. Love wants to express, wants to externalize. When a loving person is able to express their love, he becomes blissed. So, he must to be grateful with people that allow him to love them, because through them he can develop himself, he can be who really is. Many times people think the contrary: “whether I love somebody, he must be grateful with me, right?” False, is the contrary, we are the ones who must be grateful when somebody let us love him.

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