Yesterday morning my father-in-law, that is, the father of my wife, and the grandfather of my son, was cremated. It was three sad days, since we received the notice of his sudden death, after their breakfast, while he still was on the table.
We received many visitors while we was in the wake ceremony, relatives, friends, friends of relatives, friends of friends, etc. I have seen again faces that I had not seen in decades, some of them so aged that at first sight I cannot recognize them. Some of them saying I not changed at all in all these years, obviously a false assertion. Some of them saying we could meet again more frequently, another doubtful assertion.
But, over all this, there was the illusion of separation between us and the deceased. I say illusion because I’m absolutely convinced about the continuity of life, for me death is only a big change, mostly a physical one, because the person still is the same after death, at least for a while. Yet in my current state I can’t see it so clearly, not enough yet to bear with the sadness and tears of the people surrounding me, so I have had short intervals of deep sadness. So, another time, life give me another lesson, about my current development.
And yesterday at evening, at home, seeing the news, with the remember of these sad days so fresh in the memory, the quick succession of bad, very bad and irrelevant news, such as the loss of an aeroplane with more two hundred passengers, followed by the scenes of Russian force invading Crimea, followed by the last results of football championships, made me feel so far away, and remembered this word: Samsara.
Later, at night, I realized that lately, each sad fact of life, each delusion, makes me more committed to the spiritual way, the Dharma, to the way of end of suffering. Indeed, this way are becoming the first priority in my life. And this is not a selfish way, not at all, because I want to better help people to overcome their suffering. I hope so.
Dedicated to the memory of Julius.